so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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