Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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