yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
