when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
