what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize
