Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
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They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
i believe in u and ur pee
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
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