She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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