I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
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