wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Randomize
