Christians are straight up FREAKS
It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
