Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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