Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
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She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
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There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
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