and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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