All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
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