She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
