sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize