My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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