ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I have aggressive nipples.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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