Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Randomize
