my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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