About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.