My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Randomize
