sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
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I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
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