In the future we'll all be gay
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
Randomize