i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
Randomize
