I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
Randomize
