I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
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