doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
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