So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
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