So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
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