I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
You may now shotgun with the bride
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
