Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
Randomize
