Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Randomize
