there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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