Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
