Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
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