I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
Randomize
