Texts From Last Night

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  (845): View more from New York

  what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?

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  (845): what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much? http://tfl.nu/y3h1
  Replies (23) Good night (3264) Bad night (548)
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  (718): View more from New York

  If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?

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  (718): If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing? http://tfl.nu/2caf
  Replies (29) Good night (2928) Bad night (609)
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  (586): View more from Michigan

  we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.

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  (586): we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path. http://tfl.nu/fhzw
  Replies (17) Good night (1061) Bad night (5188)
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  (605): View more from South Dakota

  We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.

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  (605): We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink. http://tfl.nu/ugbw
  Replies (60) Good night (13957) Bad night (923)
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  (925): View more from California

  we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself

  (707): View more from California

  dude you teach first grade wtf

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  (925): we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself (707): dude you teach first grade wtf http://tfl.nu/gqyp
  Replies (57) Good night (8165) Bad night (2014)
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  (954): View more from Florida

  I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets

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  (954): I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets http://tfl.nu/eeot
  Replies (10) Good night (1220) Bad night (4095)
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  (+61): View more from Australia

  There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.

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  (+61): There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye. http://tfl.nu/nvha
  Replies (1) Good night (1504) Bad night (1237)
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  (217): View more from Illinois

  Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.

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  (217): Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times. http://tfl.nu/ij34
  Replies (4) Good night (2388) Bad night (604)
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  (269): View more from Michigan

  I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.

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  (269): I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it. http://tfl.nu/gxrr
  Replies (1) Good night (642) Bad night (1285)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.

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  (850): I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs. http://tfl.nu/p0c7
  Replies (11) Good night (1939) Bad night (709)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.

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  (978): Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance. http://tfl.nu/nlqh
  Replies (13) Good night (1455) Bad night (817)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.

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  (610): Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school. http://tfl.nu/m6s5
  Replies (8) Good night (2096) Bad night (501)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico

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  (651): Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico http://tfl.nu/a33d
  Replies (0) Good night (393) Bad night (262)
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.

  (540): View more from Virginia

  Of course you are.

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  (860): This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings. (540): Of course you are. http://tfl.nu/lyfi
  Replies (4) Good night (842) Bad night (327)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner

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  (717): sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner http://tfl.nu/onjq
  Replies (4) Good night (526) Bad night (267)

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