gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Randomize