Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(405): View more from Oklahoma

It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.

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(319): View more from Iowa

umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do

(1-319): View more from Iowa

put a dollar in it?

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(713): View more from Texas

my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.

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(+44): View more from England

Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(845): View more from New York

I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.

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(503): View more from Oregon

She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.

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(860): View more from Connecticut

we've started having sober sex

(203): View more from Connecticut

you really do like him

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(605): View more from South Dakota

Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right

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(803): View more from South Carolina

No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess

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