hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
