She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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