i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
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