bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
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He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
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