another moral hangover. fuck.
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
