are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Randomize