good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
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