And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Randomize