At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
