Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I need a beard to bite.
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