these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
